27 weeks pregnant with Jack. And very large.
I’ve been told first-hand many things about a second pregnancy:
It’s so much easier.
It’s so much harder.
You’re so much more exhausted.
It will go by so quickly.
It will drag on forever.
Everyone is an expert, remember?
I don’t know what things are true and which are total bull. I only have my Charlotte pregnancy to compare, and it has been fairly similar, so far. No sickness, a lot of sleepy, a few irrational worries here and there, and some ugly cries. Pretty typical pregnancy stuff, I think.
But one thing is certainly different this time around. We’ll call her Chaos (also known as Charlotte Ever).
If I’d had to chase around a crazytown toddler during my first pregnancy, I probably would have begged my OB to put me on bed rest. The first pregnancy is filled with naps and rest and sympathy from others and foot rubs from the husband.
The second? Well, little-tiny-girlfriend does not care that you feel like all the bones around your midsection are smashing together while a human plays pinball on your insides. No. She wants her milk and waffle, and she wants it now.
So, yeah. The naps are a little less frequent.
I remember having so much energy during the second trimester with Charlotte, and it’s totally nonexistent now. It’s borderline exhaustion. And it’s not because I’m doing so many things and staying so active. I wish.
I mean, I try to keep my house in order and the laundry going at all times (with five people, the laundry is literally endless. Zero end.). I do go to work two and a half days a week (which is 99% a sedentary job), and I do end up chasing a toddler-with-lipstick several times a day. So I’m not laying on the couch watching Kardashian reruns or anything (although – HOW WONDERFUL WOULD THAT BE?!), but I’m also not hitting up the treadmill or Mommy & Me Yoga, either.
I keep reminding myself that I’m growing a human being inside my body (which, really doesn’t need reminding, because he kicks me every 30 seconds … and I don’t hate it), and that takes a lot of energy. Isn’t it amazing what our bodies can do?
I also use this reminder as a way to not be depressed about how large I am with three months still to go. I was super huge with Charlotte, but not until the very end. Let me tell you- I’m super huge.
But it’s funny, this pregnancy thing. I love my body right now (minus the awful midsection and tailbone pains) more than I’ve ever loved my body. I don’t feel gross or fat, just large. And that’s okay, because I’m creating life. I adore my body even moreso now than I did when I was pregnant with Charlotte, because I know what I’m creating. I know that I could stay this large for the rest of my life, and it would still be worth every stretch mark and every pound on the scale.
I already love Jack like crazy, but I do feel a little guilty about the ever-real Second-Child Syndrome (I just made that up). (Actually, I just Googled it, and according to parenting.com, it’s a real thing. I feel better.) I think the reason this pregnancy has already flown by so quickly (28 weeks tomorrow WHAT?) is because I haven’t had time to sit around and think about being pregnant like I did the first time. It was all I thought about, all I talked about. I focused all my attention on Charlotte’s nursery furniture and getting the perfect shade of gray that wasn’t too blue or too green (because HEAVEN FORBID!).
The first 10ish weeks with Jack, I barely thought about being pregnant, other than the WHAT ARE WE DOING HAVING FOUR KIDS?! looks Evan and I would often exchange. We announced the pregnancy at Charlotte’s first birthday party to our close friends and extended family (parents and siblings already knew), so we started talking about it more after that.
But even since then, I’ve had lots of times where I’d see a baby or a pregnant lady and be all, “Oh yeah, I’m having one, too.” It was odd to forget, and I felt bad. But there’s just so much going on when you have a toddler that it’s easy to let it slip your mind.
Ain’t no forgetting now, with tailbone pain and acid reflux pooling in my throat. #PregoIsFun
I have approximately 12 weeks left before I get to cuddle my baby boy (that still seems SO weird!), and I can’t wait. That’s one of the best things about a second pregnancy – you aren’t as terrified. You know you can keep a human alive. You know sleepless nights aren’t the end of the world. And buddy, you know little baby smiles are the best thing you’ve ever seen.
I’m so thankful that God has allowed me to be a Mommy to not only one baby, but two!
And, let’s be honest, maybe we’ll throw another one into the mix next year. Evan? No? (He gone.)